Water Method for Saying Goodbye to Your Baby After Stillbirth

Water Method for Saying Goodbye to Your Baby After StillbirthPhoto credits: Kevin Vervoort Fotografie

The loss of an pregnancy is an event that most expectant parents are not prepared for. This can have psychological consequences, such as depression, post traumatic stress disorder or anxiety, which can have a negative effect on later pregnancies.

Spending time with your baby after they're born can be a precious time to create special memories and help you grieve. It's entirely up to you whether you wish to do so. You'll be given some quiet time with your baby if this is what you want.

Water Method for Saying Goodbye to Your Baby After StillbirthPhoto credits: Kevin Vervoort Fotografie

You can also take photographs of your baby and collect mementos, such as a lock of hair, foot prints or hand prints, or the blanket your baby was wrapped in at birth.

In the past, very prematurely deceased children were laid in a blanket, basket or container following the birth. Their skin then changes colour and darkens. Because the skin and bones have not yet firmed up, the child becomes distorted. 

The water method offers a solution to this. The child has lived his entire life in the water.  It is the best environment for his fragile skin. The water method does not require any special change of process, and is inexpensive. 

Water Method for Saying Goodbye to Your Baby After StillbirthPhoto credits: Kevin Vervoort Fotografie

The water method can be applied to deceased babies of any gestational age. Of course, it offers the greatest benefits in young babies, when the skin is most fragile. 

Water Method for Saying Goodbye to Your Baby After StillbirthPhoto credits: Kevin Vervoort Fotografie

The baby’s posture is also more natural in the water. Photos are sometimes taken in the water and the child is then dressed or wrapped in a blanket and laid out in a dry area. Anything is possible.

Water Method for Saying Goodbye to Your Baby After StillbirthPhoto credits: Kevin Vervoort Fotografie

Is special water required?
No, normal tap water is fine. As the child will only be kept for a few days until the funeral, no special water is necessary.

What temperature should the water be?
Cold water is best for the long term in order to retain the baby’s colour. In order to say goodbye and to touch the baby, the child can also be placed in lukewarm water. 

How long can I keep the baby in the water?
We now know that you can keep a child looking presentable for up to a week in cold water. However what you will see is that the skin absorbs more and more water whereby after a few days the child will appear swollen. After a while the child’s colour will also change. At this point it really is time for the final farewell, however difficult.